With A Flower Behind His Ear
Yesterday, while driving home from my daughter’s ballet recital, alone in the car (the kids’ weekend with their dad), I saw a picture I wanted to send to Muslim-A-Day: a very elderly Muslim man, dressed in his very traditional clothes, pausing on his walk to lean over, close his eyes and smell white flowers on a great green shrub. He stood there for a while and I could see he was a good man.
This image brought to mind my grandfather (dad’s dad), who passed away almost 2 years ago. Though he was a lean, strong man with a no-nonsense character, he would always tuck a fragrant white flower behind one ear when he went walking – and although he was extremely wealthy and could afford a driver, he walked everywhere (which accounted for his leanness). He educated each of his children in Islam and Arabic primarily but also supported the full extent of each of their educational priorities – including his daughters (which was odd for the time and place).
My grandfather never went a day without starting it with the Qur’an right after Fajr. That’s the image I have when I think of him: sitting on the porch in the lightening day, with a white scarf draped on his bent head, the Qur’an open in his arms. That kind of image stays with you and compels you to imitate it.
On Friday, June 1, my mom, sister and I took part in the Toronto Relay for Life to raise money for cancer research. I was walking for my grandfather, my mother for her sister and my sis for her mom-in-law – may Allah have mercy on their souls.
I couldn’t control my tears when i read your piece; it made me relive my dad’s memory. I pray that Allah unites us with him in the Blissful Land.
…I am thinking about abbi on the patio with an empty Perrier water by his side and the Qur’an in his hand. I have always loved these images of my father cemented in my mind from childhood.
Wonderful. It’s often the men and women who are older that realize the inherent beauty of simplicity. I wish I remembered my grandfather.
Made me think of my grandpa reading Quran too… and giving me a kiss and feeling the prickle of his white stubble against my cheek. JAK, that was beautiful.
aw thats beautiful
Ahmad, oops, I mean, dad, thanks for leaving a comment!!
Samira and Noha, it’s so nice when our memories of people involve an image which is so beautiful (like reading the Qur’an serenely), it reaches into our lives and we find ourselves reliving that image in our actions.
Asmaa, I love what you wrote on Disconnected Verses (1987) about your grandfather as you knew him through your parents’ words. That was beautiful.
Hadeel, thanks!
Touching story. reminded me of my grandfather although i only saw him when i was 4. Still left a remarkable imprint in my my mind of simplicity, and good honest earned moral living.
Wouldn’t our grandparents be proud to see their great grandchildren ’s ballet recital?
Let our children witness these such remarkable events and also say “My grandfather never went a day without starting it with the Qur’an right after Fajr. That’s the image I have when I think of him: sitting on the porch in the lightening day, with a white scarf draped on his bent head, the Qur’an open in his arms.”
I’m sure spending some money for quranic /Islamic classes would be something they would in fact love to see there grandchildren enrolled in. But (which is odd for our time and place).
May Allah give us the realization of the purpose of our life and give us the taufeeq to act towards it. Aameen
wassalam
I.-T., thanks for your comment. I don’t know if I’m reading your comment correctly, but you appear to be saying that spending money on Islamic classes would in fact make grandfathers more happy than spending it on ballet classes? Alhamdulillah, I too believe that Islamic education is integral. (Actually, really, I think Islam seen practiced @ home is more integral than Islamic classes/school). But…I still thank God, that my children are fortunate enough to learn Qur’an/Islam each morning at home with my family before they go on to their full-time Islamic school. But… I also firmly believe that children should be part of the culture they grow up in and not cordon themselves off from it but, rather, take their “Islam-ness” everywhere as they engage in society. That’s how my grandfather was and I’m sure he would beam with pride to see his young great-granddaughter being healthy, modestly attired in an all-female environment and doing a plie.
Ameen to your beautiful dua at the end.
As-Salamo alaiki,
It makes me happy to hear that your children are blessed to go to islamic schools. And yes islam being practiced at home is more essential,as the first and main madrasah for a child is the mothers lap. Qualities and morals instilled at the initial years have the effect for the rest of their lives. In tarbiiyyah the other essential thing is instilling good active healthy habits/living. This however is something the youth lack in greatly today with both parents so engrossly busied with their work. But hey they are in “need.”
Parents should enroll them in swimming, gymnastics,silent ballet,track & field,sports, etc. or teach it to them themselves and conduct the events if having the ability.
And yes islam isn’t just to be locked up in our homes and masaajid. It is a complete way of life from the market to our lavatories. But this does not mean we would have to do the unlawful to become social members of our communities.
Islam is not a topic to debate on by our whims, and inquiry of matters being lawful should be sought from Ulama who answer in correspondence, accordance,and position to Quraan and Sunnah.
May Allah keep the Muslims united in striving for Siratal Mostaqeem. wassalam
Thank you for your effects on my improper usage of the verb affect.
I.-T., I had to effect change on your verb usage lest Noha, the grammar/language queen, sights the typo and shudders up a storm up there in Ottawa…